I recently met my partner's friend and now he's texting me all the time. I don't think it's flirty but it's strange to me that he's suddenly communicating so much with me. Should I tell my partner? Is this considered cheating?
How hot is the friend and does he have money? Wait, stop. Never mind. Internal thought.
I think this one depends on the way you were introduced to the friend. Did you just happen to cross paths and get the obligatory introduction? Or was this a planned meeting with, “Hey, this is my friend, (name). Now we’re all friends” kind of thing?
How much do you know about the friend? Is he a social person with others? Is he active on social media and the life of the party? If he is, he could just be one of those friendly people that communicates with everyone all the time. (We all know people who thrive on clutching their phone and messaging with as many people as possible all at once.)
Check out his interactions with others. When he comments on social media posts, is it a mix of men, women, married, single? If it is, there’s nothing to worry about, he’s just a friendly person. If his correspondence with you seems real deep real fast, then it might be a red flag. You said yourself that you “don’t think it’s flirty” but, come on, you know what flirting is. It either is or it isn’t.
Are the conversations similar to what you have with your group of friends or co-workers? If so, no biggie. If you find that the chatter is getting more personal and on a different level – especially with a relative stranger – then it’s worth flagging.
At this point, what is there to tell your partner? Do you report to him the different levels and involvement of friendship you have with everyone? (“So-and-so sent me a 40-word text today instead of the usual 10 words. I’m worried.” Puh-lease.)
Sure, this was his friend first and is a new introduction to your life, but if he knows you two swapped phone numbers and added each other as contacts, what exactly is the problem? Be happy the friend likes you. There have been worse arrangements where the bitter friend tries to destroy the relationship because they don’t like the new partner.