Normally my partner smells great but there are times when he doesn't think to wear deodorant and has a noticeable odor. Like, noticeable. Really noticeable. It's a turnoff but how do I tell him he smells without hurting his feelings?
We’ve all done a quick ’pit sniff and thought, “Oh, shit, that IS me.” If that happens, whatever. It’s like having garlic breath after lunch and going back to work. People deal with it – once in a while. Sounds like this might be a situation they call “nose blind” – meaning, he’s around his odor so much that he doesn’t notice it anymore. Though, I find that hard to believe. Unless there’s something wrong with his nose, he can smell things like armpits or feet or breath. If he can’t, there’s nothing wrong with giving him a polite heads up.
The way this is described, however, sounds like it’s more of a smell when you’re being intimate. (Would you describe something as “a turnoff” if it were simply being out at a restaurant when “a turn-on” would be inappropriate? Probably not.) If it’s a matter of his crotch-al daddy region where deodorant wouldn’t come into play, figure out a way to introduce a new fragrance for the basement. Get something flavored like butterscotch to change the environment.
If you’re describing simple body odor – as in armpit stick, hence the deodorant mention – remember that that’s a normal body function. Armpits stink. That’s why deodorant was invented. Does he forget to put it on every – single – time? Maybe. And what if he does? It could be an oversight? Unless he’s doing it personally to turn you off (which wouldn’t make sense, anyway) this seems like a simple conversation to have. If he owns deodorant, it’s not about him taking a stand and protesting. He has it, he just forgets it once in a while. Does he at least remember to say, I love you? He does? OK, then this is petty and nothing to worry about.
If all else fails, get freaky in the shower and problem solved.